I Miss You.

Each time Pat goes away with the Army, I find that I am repeating the words "I miss you", but they do not really capture how I am really feeling. I could say that phrase to Pat in every e-mail, phone call, text message, or letter, but after a while they sound meaningless--like a casual phrase tossed around.

I don't see how these three words together can explain how lonely it is without your best friend, how I long to hear his voice, or how sad it makes me when Ryan keeps asking for his Daddy.

Every night around dinner time Ryan turns to me and asks about Pat. Trying to hide the tears in my eyes I explain Daddy has to work for a while. He keeps asking me thinking that I do not understand, but really it is he who is too young to grasp the concept that Pat's job sometimes takes him away from us for a while. My eyes are filled with the tears this time because I know that soon enough it won't be a month of separation but rather a year.

Before that year comes, I will hopefully find a better way to tell Pat, "I miss you."