Without getting into the nitty-gritty my day was long and hard. I didn't see the husband until 10 pm. He was gone to work early and had school until late. There were kids to care for, naps to be had, dogs to be fed. There were three year olds accidentally stepping in baby's dirty diaper and walking on the carpet as I yelled "stop!" A tired kid had to go to school. Dinner was made, and the kids refused to eat. I believe they said something like, "eww, what is this? Can't we have something normal in a bowl, like cottage cheese or something?" So the spinach lasagna casserole was not a hit obviously.
And as the last stab into my mommy heart, Ryan sang a song he made up after dinner. The part that made me feel awful was when he sang, "Mommy is always busy, and Daddy works every day." It's true. I am always busy, but if that is how my son feels, I am failing.
The boys did not listen yesterday. I didn't have patience. There were tantrums and not just from the children. It wasn't the way I intended it to be. Don't get me wrong though, it wasn't all bad. There were I love you's, hugs, and snuggles, but it wasn't what I would consider a good day.
Today is a new day. It is a new beginning. It is a day I can make things right. I can try again. I can do better. I can love more. I can be more patient. I can try to be more present and less busy. I can live today like I should have yesterday, and that is just what I will do. I am thankful that today is another day.
"Another day has almost come and gone
Can't imagine what else could go wrong
Sometimes I'd like to hide away somewhere and lock the door
A single battle lost but not the war ('cause)
Tomorrow's another day
And I'm thirsty anyway
So bring on the rain"
Jo Dee Messina Bring On The Rain
3 comments:
I deal with being super busy here too. Don't beat yourself up over it too much. You're not at all failing. Moms are busy. And if they're not busy, they have 1 child and a messy house and people to run errands for them and a grandma nearby. Hope today is better for you!
I love how honest you are girl! Seriously! I'm so proud of you for admitting that you have some things to improve on. I think it takes a really special heart to see that and I can only pray that when I'm a mother, I will be able to do the same! Thank you for the reminder to live in the here and now!
I hope your day was better, love. Here to chat anytime you need!
XOXO!
Kenz
I love this post Shelly and I admire you for telling us exactly how your day was, because you are never alone in feeling this way. We all have days just like yours and we try so hard to keep our heads above water but always feel like we are sinking. You are right, tomorrow is a new day and you cannot beat yourself up over yesterday, because by acknowledging that it could have been better already means you have not failed...You're a great mummy xo
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