I have come to realize that I am that mom. The mom that I would see at stores before I had children, and I automatically disliked her and felt sorry for her children. That mom is in a bad mood, sounds nasty to her children, and just has a general pissed off disposition. I always felt like the children didn't deserve to wrath of the mother's bad mood. That was until I became that mom.
Although I hate to admit it, I've been out at a store sounding nasty at my boys and appearing to be in a bad mood for no reason more times than I'd like to count. But if there is anyone like my former self watching and judging me, I would love to explain why I seem so mean and unhappy.
My day before getting to that store would probably go a little like this:
Wake up and have a cup of coffee and try to steal 5 minutes to myself in which I check e-mails, blog, or anything that makes me feel like a real person. All the while the boys are either wresting, fighting, screaming, or crying. Leah is in the jumperoo for probably one of the only times all day where she'll be okay without me sitting with her. If I choose to shower, she will scream the entire time, and the boys will probably tear apart one of their rooms leaving a trail of toys to their next adventure. I have exactly 3 minutes to throw on clothes, makeup, deodorant, etc. before Leah is in a full-fledged meltdown. Of course I'd have to get the boys dressed before going out. On a good day I'd be on top of the laundry and their drawers would be full. It isn't always a good day though. I pull out clothes that match reasonably and begin to try to wrangle the boys. This is when Sean begins to show his disagreement with my opinion that we need to wear clothes to the store. I dare anyone judging that mother to try to dress two boys while holding a 23lb 6 month old baby. When the boys are dressed, usually 25 minutes later, we can finally head to the car. If I do not allow toys into the minivan Sean will be in his terrible-three year old mode. And even if I do allow the toys, he'll pretty much refuse to get into his seat. Once we are at the store, there will be another freakout from the children over who gets to sit/cling to the shopping cart where. If they had it their way, we would not be able to fit any groceries in the cart and this would just be a joy ride around the store. On the really bad days, we have to go back out to the car to end the tantrum before we enter the store for the second time to get the milk and other necessities we are out of.
So I guess I would say to the person judging that mom:
Just wait till you are dragging your child off the walmart floor kicking and screaming having a tantrum to end all tantrums after a long morning of what can only be termed chaos. And if you think you won't end up being in that mom's shoes, just wait. I promise that one day you will find yourself with that child, and it is then that you will realize that sometimes being that mom is just what happens.