July 12, 2012

My Fear of Girls

Yesterday I posted about having a baby girl, and that it surprised me how right it felt since I had always pictured myself with boys.

Part of the reason I think I wanted to have boys during my first two pregnancies was that I was afraid of having a girl.

My biggest fear about raising a girl is that one day she will hate me.  Well, maybe not hate me, but dislike and lash out at me.  Some teenage girls do that, and I'm one that was guilty of it.  It's funny how me having a girl makes me feel more guilt for the way I behaved as a teenager.  Sometimes girls can be bitchy, and I was certainly one that fell into that category.  My crankiness was directed at everyone, but I definitely gave the brunt of it to my mother.  My poor mother who did so much for me and made daily sacrifices to take care of me had to endure my attitude.

The thought of my relationship with my sweet baby girl in the teenage years scares me.  If she's anything like I was, I'm in trouble.  I guess I'll just have to try to remember that it is a phase.  My mother and I are very close.  I didn't mean the unkindness that I probably displayed.  And I owe so much gratitude to my mother for making me the woman and mother I am today.

I hope that despite the rough moments that my baby girl will love me and appreciate me as much as I do my mom.
Leah @ 4 weeks old


Jessica said...

girls are fun :)
I understand what your saying, I had (and have) those same thoughts.

Kelly said...

I understand what you mean! Hopefully our girls will be sweet teenagers! :)

Anonymous said...

You are correct. When things get tough, keep telling yourself it is a phase. And a phase that you will probably miss when you're older. :)

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