June 4, 2008

Lonely Life

It really is a lonely life lately.  I find my days pretty occupied with feeding Ryan and playing with him around his nap schedule.  However, it is often that Ryan and I go days and days without seeing anyone.  We take an evening walk most nights, and sometimes we see a neighbor to say a quick hello to as we pass.  At night after Ryan is in bed, I surf the internet, but it has really got to the point where I have nothing else to look up on there.  I think I need to buy a book the next time I go to Borders.   I thought about scrapbooking tonight, but I just didn't want to make all the noise getting my stuff out, and then I realized I was too tired anyway.  I think my dogs are even a little lonely.  I am so thankful for the telephone, it really is my only communication with the world outside of my house.  My family and friends definitely keep me sane with the phone calls. And the "computer calls" I get from Pat are absolutely amazing.  I can hear his voice and he gets to see Ryan.  I am so grateful that we are able to communicate so well despite him being deployed.  
My mother-in-law is coming out this weekend.  It will be a short trip, but just long enough to give me a little break from the isolation that I sometimes feel here.  It will be nice having her here to watch Ryan while I do the things I've been  too busy to do (or just neglecting) like giving a good scrub to my bathroom. 
While this post may seem like I'm unhappy, I'm actually very  happy even though I sometimes feel lonely.  I feel very lucky with my life.  Everyday I think about and reflect upon how I got to where I am and how I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.  

1 comment:

Robyn said...

Shelly,

I know exactly how you feel :( But, you need to contact those girls. I know, I get incredibly phobic of talking to people I have never met before, but these girls are so nice. And, they can also be connections for watching Ryan sometimes so that you can just get out. Who wouldn't want to watch that cutie? I know how hard it is, and I wish that I was there. Of course, I would be making us go do a TON of stuff and you would probably get too overwhelmed, lol. I'm here though if you ever need to vent! I mean it!

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