July 11, 2008

Hard To Like

I'll admit that I'm finding it very hard to like it here.  I'm afraid that these eight plus months of this current deployment are going to color the rest of the time we spend here, even when Pat does return.  My feelings toward the post and town are unfortunately forming while I am less than happy here.  All I can do is think about when we'll be able to leave.  Honestly it really isn't a bad place, but I associate it with loneliness and isolation.  It probably didn't help matters when during one phone conversation Pat casually slipped in the rough date of when his next deployment will be--possibly less than a year from his return.  I do not even feel like this house is our home either.  We have not done anything yet to make it our own, and that makes it feel foreign to me. I want my paint colors on the walls and permanent marks that show our time spent here.  

Since it is just the beginning of our journey here, will I be able to change my point of view on this post or will I dislike it as a result of the rocky beginning?  I guess only time will tell, but right now I'm thinking it's doomed.     

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