A Little Bit of Worry

Recently Pat brought home his training calendar. We've already talked about when he'll be in the field and off to training, but seeing it on a calendar made all the difference. I will say, I've been a bit freaked out since noticing on the calendar that Pat goes into the field the week before my due date and doesn't come out until a week after my due date. It really doesn't help the situation that I don't know what to plan for with the birth--meaning I'm not sure if I'm having a repeat c-section for trying for a VBAC. The hospital still cannot find the surgery report, and I've only seen staff that I'd call less than informed on the whole vbac situation.

The things I do know are somewhat calming for me. I have Pat's cell number and the number for staff duty. My mother is coming out around my due date to watch Ryan while I'm in the hospital. If I haven't gone into labor on my own at some point after my due date, then I know I'll have a c-section (you cannot induce a vbac). I guess I'm worried because labor is scary enough, especially since I'm like a first timer at this since Ryan was breech, it just makes me a little bit more fearful to think about Pat being in the field and whether I can contact him and starting off all alone. Along with all this worry is my stress about what to do with Ryan if I were to have to deliver before my mother is out here. Pat has a friend who we can call, but I'm always afraid of what to do if we can't reach them.

I know everything will work out. I'm sure my worry is for nothing. I'd probably bet money that I do not even go into labor. Hopefully at my next appointment I'll be able to get more clarity on the options I have and have a better idea of what I am planning to do. So even while I know everything will work out, it did throw me for a loop to think about the situation and logistics of labor alone and what to do with Ryan, etc.